Escape from the cage

A couple days ago, the key to the cage was handed over, and today the doors are opened.

I finally got my articles signed off, and today is my last day in this office. Next week ushers in a new life, teeming with new experiences, new people, new beginnings.

I am married now. Im gonna be someone's mom by the end of this year. And, I don't really need to study anymore unless I REALLY want to. (Which remains to be seen).

The padded cage is no more.

With acceptance and love, comes happiness and motivation; Contentment.

Everything is going to be alright.

[p.s. i'm gonna keep blogging here --> my pregnancy blog ]

Pristine blossoms of the over-mind

Never mind all of that.

Because I am that kind of person, I have a list to tell me what I need to do. next to each item on said list, is a due date/time. without my list, I am lost.

I am a chronic procrastinator. It’s what I do. see? I should be working right now, but I’m not. Instead, I sit here and just wish the time away. What of my work, you ask? Well, that is to be done hurriedly and slovenly when pressure ensues.

I am still burdened and saddened by thoughts of my ex. The break-up / The love/hate pseudo-friendship that existed for months afterward / The hurtful remarks / The getting to grips with the situation / The new girlfriend / Hearing of the new relationship that so instantly replaced 5 years / The dawning of realisation that that which was will not be again.

Sometimes it’s hard to come to terms with the fact that something you put all your energy into: love, time, money, effort, affection; was all for naught.

He isn’t that into me.

What a harsh reality.

They say things only bother you if you let them. And, only the hurt person can end the hurting cycle. I’m supposed to … just stop feeling hurt, or something. Forgive and forget. Make peace. Time numbs. [insert other over-done axiom of encouragement here]

How do you know when a relationship is well and truly over?

I suppose I have to compile another list.

Ways to get over heartbreak:

1. …

And therein lies the problem.

cul-de-sac

this is the end.

it's been interesting.

*bow out*

i'm done.

i have nothing left to say. nothing left to do. nothing left to offer.

*if you ever did in the first place*

shut up.

assume the position.

snuff the candle of the worthless.

*light a candle for the sinners, set the world on fire*,
as mr manson said. back before he hit his mid-life crisis, or whatever the f*** compelled him to leave Dita for a toddler.

i don't want to be around anymore.

as radiohead said, "i'm a creep. i'm a weirdo. what the hell am i doing here? i don't belong here."

i don't belong here.

137th and Final Post on this Discontent

From the Phantom:

I gave you my music,
Made your song take flight
And now, how you’ve repaid me,
Denied me and betrayed me.

There is only so much pain one individual can take.

The padded cage has been locked, and the key destroyed.

To all the whispering voices that visited and brought my cage to life, I thank you with all my heart.

Ladies and gentlemen, It has been a pleasure, and an honour.

This is the end.