a life wasted
a couple things i learned the hard way while working for pricks with calculators
1. get EVERYTHING in writing.
coz when the shit hits the fan, everyone – your managers, so-called friends and HR, all get selective amnesia and can’t remember any conversations ever taking place.
2. you have NO FRIENDS in the corporate world. coz everyone there is just gonna cover their own ass.
3. your company WILL screw you up the ass and expect you to smile. and keep smiling. they can even state that “being miserable” is grounds for not getting promoted.
4. you are nothing but a number to your company, despite all the bullshit they feed you. you’re a resource, like a pack of post-its, and they will you keep you there at the lowest possible salary if they can get away with it. and they will. coz they’re sneaky bastards.
5. even when something is not your fault, but happens to your detriment, if you DID NOT cover your ass with a document trail, you are FUCT, despite being a shining example of dedication; see point 6 below.
6. They will only remember where you screwed up. never the free overtime hours. when you did extra work. all the happy clients. when you were below budget. when you made extra money for the boss. if you brought in new clients. they will only remember that one time in ’89 you blew the budget by a day. more selective amnesia.
7. there is no work-life balance. its a myth. ditto with “flexible work hours for mothers”. it’s something they put on the HR policy to look pretty. good luck with finding that in practice.
8. the bottom line IS the BOTTOM LINE. the bosses are there to make cash munny.
9. when you are crying in the bathroom by yourself, trying to hide the puffiness, etc, NO ONE will come cheer you up. if anyone talks to you after, its to get the gossip. and spread it. like the fear of gawd has been put in them to do so.
10. this is only the beginning. setting you up for failure, screwing you in the ass, and blaming you for it... can’t wait for next year.
Labels: my job sucks
posted by AristoNeeks | 3:44 pm
Wise words Neko.
But I hope there are things to smile about too. :)
How very true. The world is a cold, dark place--even if your boss finally gives you a light bulb for your office. I've had my share of problems with the corporate world as well. Enjoy the following attempt at commiseration.
1.) Even when things are in writing, they mean nothing if your boss doesn't remember writing them. And if he does remember writing them, he'll just say he was being controlled by the shadow government, rendering said papers useless. You can't beat your boss ... unless you do it physically by breaking his legs.
2.) You have no friends in the corporate world unless you bum the janitor cigarettes from time to time.
3.) Your company expects you to smile at all times, unless you smile like a lunatic and talk to yourself about covering your cubicle with blood.
4.) Your company will trade you for a pack of neon-colored post-its--you're slightly more valuable than a pack of regular, yellow post-its.
5.) Everything that happens is your fault no matter how dedicated you are. Less-dedicated employees are seldom in the office, and the boss has to blame someone for his own errors.
6.) Do they remember the time you stopped a crack team of Chuck Norris clone zombies from killing everyone in the office? No. Do they remember when you challenged God Himself to a kickboxing match so he would slow down time, allowing you to save the company from impending deadlines? No. What about when you gave the boss' wife part of your liver to save her life? Shit no. How about when you misspelled Mr. Niratpattanasai's last name in an e-mail you wrote for your boss while he was sticking it to one of the ad-sales girls in the bathroom. Of course they remember it. Niratpattanasai has two Ts, you moron!
7.) Working 19 hours a day for two weeks is no reason to get overtime pay. In fact, who said you were getting paid at all?
8.) The bottom line is the last line of coke the boss snorts off of his desk. (Oh, that's where my paycheck went.)
9.) The bathroom is for the boss only. He eats a lot of French food rich in entrails, so he'll be in there quite often. And, yes, your desk is right outside the bathroom door. It smells like working in the middle of a slaughterhouse run by vomiting, human-sized turds.
10.) The boss fled the country, you're out of a job, and the Mafia is looking to talk to you about some debts your boss left behind.
Hang in there. Things are bound to get better.
morb..
^_^
thanks for the smile.
you know what im talking about.
Weet nie wat om te sê nie, maar, die werk is nie alles nie. Firma's soek alles swart op wit, en maak nie saak wat hulle sê nie, op die einde van die dag wil hulle net hulle geld kry, en #@# die res. As jy nie na jouself uitkyk nie, dan gaan hulle dit ook nie doen nie. Onthou net, daar is mense daar buite wat omgee en jou sal bystaan. Moet nie alleen in die badkamer gaan huil nie, maar, kry eerder vir jou 'n sagte skouer. En, dit sal beter ruik as die badkamer.
Byt vas, en moet nooit opgee nie. Moet nie dat hulle jou mishandel nie.
Groete - Nelspruit.
thanks, nelspruit.
^_^
dis darem amper di einde.. hopelik
Well...I can definately relate. Especially to the selective amnesia.
Good you know it. Its easy to stay once you qualify...but remembering this...you'll be less inclined to keep with the status quo.
Hang in there!
xx
pinks
PS - how did the exams go?
thanx, pinks.
i'm hanging in there, as best i can, by the neck.
the exams were... i dunno, exams. 10 hours of gruelling horror. but, im hoping for the best.
exam results to be revealed on the 22nd of june...
*yikes*