trample not my halo
as generally accepted SA practice dictates – when family comes over for ‘n kuier [visit], then it is customary to braai [barbeque].
so, i have written it, cast it in stone and proclaimed the prophecy --> and it has come to pass.
upon the arrival of the guests [read: relatives], compulsory hugs and kisses were distributed. flesh was seared. skin, flayed. everything was consumed. nothing left to chance.
do, not be fooled by my serene countenance. i believe myself to be an easy-going, pleasant-natured individual. usually. mayhaps seeing family brings out the worst in my inner demons.
a pet peeve of mine: since time inconceivable, when my old people cast their gaze upon me, they would hand out tasks, like insulin at a diabetes festival. as if to say:” oh, good! you’re here. now do this, go get this and don’t forget to clean that...” there is no end. it is endless. it continues for all eternity. i am certain, 23 years ago, my parents looked at each other and said: “hmmm... it kinda sucks doing things for ourselves. perhaps we should make a spawnling who we will train to do whatever we say.” *mwohahahahaha*
and so it came to be.
[[do not misunderstand me. i do not mind the menial tasks delegated to me by my elders. in fact, it is quite a pleasure to serve them at times. i agree with my mom when she says there will come a day when i may not have parents and would wish i could do just one more thing for them, gofer just one more task. the frustration rears its hideous head when every second of my day is spent doing this and that... being ignored when i ask them to clarify... no thank yous... no praise... no nothing. just constant nagging. the worst is when im asked to do something i already did. *sigh* my boyfriend can attest to this. it gets pretty bad sometimes.]]
[[[quick illustration: my boyfriend used to live only an hour away from me, back in the green days of our relationship. on two occasions it happened that he drove down to see me for the day, but then didnt get to see me. why do you ask? well, simply becoz my parents were sending me around so much. i dont know whether it is intentional, or just coz they are used to it... i really dont know. but, that didnt make me any less pissed. seeing my boyfriend is something i look forward to... its something that makes me unable to eat or sleep the couple of days before it happens. so, for him to be here and for me to barely see him... “livid” does not even begin to describe my disposition at those times... but, i digress]]]
the cause of this post [coz, we are working with cause and effect here, ladies and gentlemen. do try to keep up!], is the fact that, when family come to visit, they have this nasty habit of taking up bathroom time. i am, essentially, Q-ing for the shower right this second. which is interesting. there are 7 toilets, 3 baths and 5 showers on this property. you’d think some people would use just the designated toilet areas for... oh, nevermind.
patience is a virtue, after all.
its is good to see the extended family. every so often. im sure there are many positives to it... it may be because it is late, but right now, i cant think of any.
ah – godliness beckons... for to be clean, is (to be) divine...
so, i have written it, cast it in stone and proclaimed the prophecy --> and it has come to pass.
upon the arrival of the guests [read: relatives], compulsory hugs and kisses were distributed. flesh was seared. skin, flayed. everything was consumed. nothing left to chance.
do, not be fooled by my serene countenance. i believe myself to be an easy-going, pleasant-natured individual. usually. mayhaps seeing family brings out the worst in my inner demons.
a pet peeve of mine: since time inconceivable, when my old people cast their gaze upon me, they would hand out tasks, like insulin at a diabetes festival. as if to say:” oh, good! you’re here. now do this, go get this and don’t forget to clean that...” there is no end. it is endless. it continues for all eternity. i am certain, 23 years ago, my parents looked at each other and said: “hmmm... it kinda sucks doing things for ourselves. perhaps we should make a spawnling who we will train to do whatever we say.” *mwohahahahaha*
and so it came to be.
[[do not misunderstand me. i do not mind the menial tasks delegated to me by my elders. in fact, it is quite a pleasure to serve them at times. i agree with my mom when she says there will come a day when i may not have parents and would wish i could do just one more thing for them, gofer just one more task. the frustration rears its hideous head when every second of my day is spent doing this and that... being ignored when i ask them to clarify... no thank yous... no praise... no nothing. just constant nagging. the worst is when im asked to do something i already did. *sigh* my boyfriend can attest to this. it gets pretty bad sometimes.]]
[[[quick illustration: my boyfriend used to live only an hour away from me, back in the green days of our relationship. on two occasions it happened that he drove down to see me for the day, but then didnt get to see me. why do you ask? well, simply becoz my parents were sending me around so much. i dont know whether it is intentional, or just coz they are used to it... i really dont know. but, that didnt make me any less pissed. seeing my boyfriend is something i look forward to... its something that makes me unable to eat or sleep the couple of days before it happens. so, for him to be here and for me to barely see him... “livid” does not even begin to describe my disposition at those times... but, i digress]]]
the cause of this post [coz, we are working with cause and effect here, ladies and gentlemen. do try to keep up!], is the fact that, when family come to visit, they have this nasty habit of taking up bathroom time. i am, essentially, Q-ing for the shower right this second. which is interesting. there are 7 toilets, 3 baths and 5 showers on this property. you’d think some people would use just the designated toilet areas for... oh, nevermind.
patience is a virtue, after all.
its is good to see the extended family. every so often. im sure there are many positives to it... it may be because it is late, but right now, i cant think of any.
ah – godliness beckons... for to be clean, is (to be) divine...
posted by AristoNeeks | 8:13 am
I am the bad cousin whom misses weddings, christenings and the occassional funeral. My extended family is so large that I don't even know the names of all of them, let alone their faces.
Perhaps that makes me lucky.
*for shame!! for shame!!*
i have an intrinsic interest in the family history.. dunno, maybe i like stories.
*its amazing how messed up other people's lives were, even back in the good ole days!*
if one does not know their extended family, it is the fault of one's parents for not introducing and "kuier-ing" since an early age.
so, it stands to reason that i know the cousins i played with as a young spawnling. the rest -- strangers.
sad, but true.
I don't usually get sent around doing stuff, except by my grandparents who can't walk, so I don't mind.
And it's not always the fault of the parents... the reason I don't know a lot of my mom's family is that they all live in East London. I know the first cousins and that, but anything that moves a generation above my gran and branches down from there is a mystery to me.
Sounds like you have a snazzy house, with all those ablutions. And there is still a backlog? Wow.
the house is okay. it's a relatively big house.. but, the relatives come in droves when they do come..
thing is, i like using MY bathroom. there are 2 flats on the property. im *not* going outside to take a shower. im picky that way.
i love hearing the really old people talk about their pasts. and who had how many kids, and how everyone is related. makes for great story time.
*specially when you hear about the scandals and such*
^_^
its a pity everyone lives so far away...
i completely relate to the way your old people keep telling you to do stuff for them. Coz mine do the same...
Maybe its a way for them to show interest in us or to acknowledge us....who knows...
you should take comfort in the fact that out there,there is someone who has it worse than you...........
it's one of my personal mantras:
it-couldv-been-worse-it-couldve-been-worse-it-couldve-been-worse..
The problem lies in the fact that no matter how old you get you'll always be the little girl that needs the supervision of her elders.
-Like I always say to my mom, what do I do the other 364 days when your not here?
I have a large family on my fathers side, but no one talks to each other so there are no family get togethers.
This is very informative--
What you are basically saying is: "If you meet a hot South African chick, one way to 'cool your jets' is to picture her family coming over, waking you up at the inhumane hour of noontime, and eating all of your food every time the wind blows."
That image does have a way of bringing you back down to earth. I have used it previously when I have met a hot Mexican chick. And a hot Indian chick.
(Jewish chicks are allowed a little leeway on this issue, since their dad is richer than God; who is also Jewish...)
The great thing about being an American WASP is that after you graduate from high school, you never see your parents again.
One would assume that this problem could be circumvented by merely meeting a hot WASP chick. But the sheer maintenance of this endeavor--i.e., taking the WASP female to the airport, taking them for laser exfoliation treatment, memorizing the names of all her cats, remembering her name, listening to the political intricacies of her job, etc.--ironically makes one wish that her dad would come over and take you to the golf course.
(Preferrably Augusta National, where no women are allowed.)
The old "you'll miss me when I'm gone" line is hard to argue with.
"Stop being so demanding while you're here (please) isn't too unreasonable though...